No Idea.

I'm so confused.
I don't even know what to write.
My mood changes so freaking fast and I'm tired of it.

Yesterday I was fine for most of the day, and all of the sudden it got night time and there I am locking myself in the bathroom crying. I don't know why. Well, never mind yes I do. Then I felt like crap the whole time before I went to bed. So I climb into bed and there I am crying again.

Peachy.

I honestly thought things changed after I got back from my trip. I felt better, I had a new prospective on things. But now it's like someone hit a freaking switch and everything's how it used to be and I don't like it one bit.

I felt so determined after the trip, but now I feel like that's all gone and everything's just a pile of beans.

I don't know why.

What happened?
People.

I need to be by myself.
For a long time.

Cardiologist said I have "low blood pressure". Well I have no clue why when I'm a freaking mess all of the time. You think I would have high blood pressure.

Gosh and today is going to suck.
There's another thing. After the trip I had a new outlook on things, and I was having a lot of good days. I was happy.
Now it's back to how it used to be.
Why?

What happened?

I'm just going to freak out and tell people how I feel because people need to recognize that I'm not an ant, so stop stepping on me.

Alone time is what I need.
Fuck everything else.

And I don't really give a shit if the freaking king and queen of the world reads this, I'm fed up.