Valentine's Day

It's Valentines Day, and my feelings are kind of hurt. Almost everyone in every class I've been in so far today has received candy, a flower, or these "crush can" things that my school was selling. Even the people that no one really likes have gotten things. It just really hurts my feelings that no one got me ANYTHING. I did get a poster from a friend, but I would get that even if it wasn't Valentine's Day, because she knows how much I like Big Time Rush. I did appreciate that, but it just really hurts my feelings to know that I made treat bags for eight people, and I haven't received anything back. I'm the kind of person that thinks that if I give something, I should receive. But obviously that's not going to happen today. Plus at least 3 people told me personally that they were going to get something for me, and they never did.

Next year, I'm not going to give candy to anyone. I'll go buy a bag of candy, flowers, and "crush cans" for myself. No one else cares enough to get anything for me anyway.
I don't care if I sound like a selfish brat.
My feelings are seriously hurt.

My Weekend.

I haven't written a blog in at least a week, so I thought I should write one today. A lot of things have been bothering me anyway, and I need to let some of them out.

My weekend has been really sucky. People were irritating the crap out of me all of last week, and the weekend hasn't gotten any better. I was so mad after school on Friday that when I got in the car, I started crying. I've been doing that a lot, and I think it's because of all the built up anger inside of me. This whole year has been thrown at me, and I'm finally absorbing it all. I haven't really gotten a chance to grieve or anything because things keep piling up and won't stop happening.

I don't even know how to describe yesterday. I should have been happy, but I wasn't. My stupid school decided to mail our midterms finally even though midterms were actually almost two weeks ago. My mom checked the mail and there they were. She saw that I have two F's. She wasn't as mad as my dad would've been, but she was still upset. Usually I get all A's and one or two B's. But now it feels like I can't concentrate in school because everything that's been happening at home and outside of school is hurting me so much. I need time alone. I can't keep going like this.

Today has been bad too because I had to clean. I hate cleaning. I also really hate it when someone is supposed to come to your house, but you have no clue what time. That gets me extremely stressed. I like to be prepared for things.

The Grammy Awards are on tonight. I'm only excited about them because I want Lady Gaga to win. I've been a little monster (Gaga fan) ever since "Just Dance" came out. I'm a bigger fan of Big Time Rush, but I still love her. I feel like we have a lot of similarities, because we've both been through a lot. Her music is really something I can connect to and understand. That's why I listen to "Marry The Night" every day before school. I can relate to that song.

What's On My Mind Today.

I just got done with the lesson and test in this class, so the teacher said I have the rest of the class (about 45 minutes) to do whatever I want. This happens almost every day. That's probably why I love this class so much.

Since I have all of this free time and nothing to do, I decided to blog since I only blog about once or twice a week anymore. I want to blog more, but usually I'm busy with homework and family stuff. It seems like my life completely flipped around in the last year. I used to never be busy. Now I'm the complete opposite. It seems like things never stop.

I honestly have no idea what to even write about right now. So if you actually do read my blog and you are going to continue reading this right now, be warned: this post might get extremely random. That always happens when I have nothing to talk about. Of course, I do have a lot of things on my mind. But most things are better kept in my mind than exposed to the world.

I really like squirrels. I don't know if I've ever written about how much I love them though, so now I am. At home, there are actually about four squirrels that we even have named. If I'm outside with bread in my hand, they will come up and take it right from me. Squirrels are so cute. How could anyone dislike them?

I've also been noticing a lot of the readers of my blog are from Russia. That's really cool. I live in the United States, so it's awesome when another country visits my blog. Thanks a lot to anyone who actually finds this blog enjoyable to read. I don't understand how anyone could find it entertaining though.

I'm not very good at counting days, but if I'm counting correctly, there's two months and three days until my birthday. I'm excited, but yet I'm not. I'm not sure what I'm going to do yet. If I have a party I will feel bad because I can't invite all of my friends. I hate having to pick and choose people. I've made a lot of new friends this year, and I've learned who my true friends are. I don't want anyone to feel left out, because I know how that feels. But I guess I have to do what I have to do. I don't even know if I actually want a party. My dream birthday right now is a day away from everyone. I wish I could be by myself that whole day, but that's not going to happen unfortunately. Hopefully someday it will though.

It feels like I'm writing a book right now because I'm writing such a long blog.

I'm so popular that I only got one new e-mail today, and it was from a teacher. How cool am I? (Not.)

I really need to stop caring about other people if they don't care about me. All it's doing is putting a butt load of stress on me. (Yes, I did just use the words "butt load".)

Yay, two of my friends are on my instant messager right now. I'm going to go talk to them.

Have a great day, it's Friday!

Quick Post

I'm in one of my classes, but he's giving us a 10 minute break since we have been working for the last hour. I decided to write a blog because there's nothing else to do.

The door of this classroom is over, so I can see the hallway. I see two other classrooms across the hallway, and one of them has a sign next to it that says "No whining." I really like that sign. It seems like everyone is always whining about stupid things now. I will admit that I whine too, but I have good reasons to. It just irritates me when people whine because their life is "so bad" but yet there's honestly nothing wrong with their life. Always remember that there are people that are going through way more than you.

Oh no. My teacher is cutting the break short. Ugh.
Bye for now.